About being awake

 

So here we are then… The last day of 2014. The countdown to 2015. However did we get here so fast? January is only 2 days ago. You know what they say: Time flies when you’re having fun. And that’s exactly what 2014 was. Fun.

About a year ago, I was writing this exact same ‘end of year’ blogpost. And I felt very disappointed. I had a horrible 2013 and it had taken its toll. I was so exhausted and desperate. Only a few people ever read this. Reading this now in my current situation, I can’t believe I managed to recover from that. I was so close on giving up but I pushed myself to keep going.

I made a new list with things I could and should achieve in 2014 and at first glance: I didn’t do all that bad. Let’s check it out!

Get some big, cool projects and totally nail them.

Holy, shitballs! I blew that one so hard out of the water; I can’t even believe it. 2014 was a wild ride of important, huge, big, fantastic clients. It’s hard to overstate just how important this was and how I totally rocked that challenge! Thanks to Metropoly, TVBastards, Sven Dens, Deauty, TEK Systems and De Persgroep. What a brilliant year!

Blog more. So do more.

I kinda failed that one. I think. I didn’t really blog as much as I’d liked but quite honestly: That’s because I just worked my ass off and decided to enjoy my life with the girlfriend some more. I might not have written any more blogposts than in the previous past few years but I did enjoy life and experiences more. I most definitely did more. I’d give it a 50-50 success score. I’ll take that pass-fail.

Do more teaching

I did get a few more opportunities to give some workshops but the real teaching happened during my time at Metropoly where I totally started rocking JS/CSS3 and WordPress again. I got to share a lot of what I learned and I think I was able to really contribute to their development approaches. If I see how we managed to improve the development flows and approaches, I think we did a pretty great job. It might not have been the ‘teaching’ I envisioned but I’m very happy with the impact I had and the way I was able to do it. I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

Keep skateboarding

I totally did! I went out for a lot of practicing (video & video)  and I even bought a new board! And I have already set myself a challenge for next year concerning skateboarding (first blogpost in 2015, watch this space if you’re curious). More skateboarding next year!

Make more videos

Yea, I didn’t. I totally wanted to have at least 10 or so out there. I don’t think 4 short ones and a few Snapchat stories qualify as ‘more‘ or even ‘enough‘ (considering what I had in mind back then). Here’s a list of all the video’s I made this year.

  1. Chasing the perfect heelflip [Youtube]
  2. Friday afternoon skate session [Youtube]
  3. Nike Fuelband [Youtube]
  4. Our little Rex [Youtube]
  5. Google Streetview Snapchat adventure (movie about that coming up next year… I hope)

Quite honestly I’m still looking for an easy way to edit video’s. I film a lot of video using my iPhone but that’s where things stop. Getting the footage on my computer into an editing program seems to be where the process dies on me. I tried editing some video’s on my iPhone but there’s too many limitations. I need something to improve the flow here. Still a work in progress I’d say.

Make more people laugh

I must have done that. Never in my life have so many different people told me to become a stand-up comedian. I’m not sure whether it’s something I’d like to pursue (it’s not) but I like to think it means, I made people laugh. I’d call that a success. Also: That was fun!

Don’t be so ashamed

A lot of good stuff happens when you decide to not let shame hold you back. Good laughs, interesting turns of events, life-altering experiences… It worked. It was worth it.

Get a tattoo

Made the appointment in January. Got tattooed on February 6th. I just remembered I filmed the whole thing. I should make an edit of that. I’m sure my pain-face while trying to look tough is hilarious.

The tattoo I got is just a word that says ‘RELENTLESS’ on my arm. It was both a reminder and a message to myself: A reminder to remember where I came from and just how far I got by not giving up. A message to myself considering the recent doubts I had about myself at the time: You cannot give up. You must not give up. No matter what happens. You must keep fighting.

Become an official organ donor

I signed the papers for this mere days after writing down that blogpost. I became official on January 31st.
If you can’t save my life, save somebody else’s“.

Re-invent my #everyday’s adventure.

Well, this one is actually a bit of a shame as I was really proud with the results of last years Everyday project. I made 1 more #everyday this year and it took me several days to complete it. And I wasn’t even that happy about it. Maybe later again.

Participate in the Midnight Run this summer and finish somewhere at the top.

If there’s 1 thing on this list that I totally and absolutely failed, it’s this one. I never even got close to participating. Hell, when push came to shove, I didn’t even knew it was happening that day. I just noticed a lot of activity in the street and realized: “Well, I blew my chance at that one, didn’t I?!

Spoil my girlfriend

Oh yea: I did. I hope she agrees 🙂

Inspire more people

Not sure: I don’t think I did. Honestly, I don’t think I should know if I did. What would it matter? Would it change anything? Would it make me feel better about myself? Should it?
I’m not even sure I should inspire people too much with my current lifestyle of rapid changes and opportunistic career choices. Maybe someday if I have proven to make the right decisions, I might do good inspiring people with my ideals and experience. But not yet.

Conclusion

2014 was great. The 1 thing that stood out of me was that for the first time in many many years, I felt awake at all times. I was aware of the fact that I was in full control. Everything I wanted to achieve this year was bound to be as a result of something that I put in motion. So I had to make it happen.

I found myself being rather self-conscious every single time I had to decide anything. Moving to a new house, agreeing to long-time terms with new partners, leaving those partners for new challenges and at least 20 other of those choices where I used to be a passenger in my own decisions. This year, I was fully aware. Fully awake. Completely present. And if the results of this year are any indication, I’m sure more great stuff is bound to happen in the years to come.

2014 was great. It felt great.
Thanks to everybody who was there.
Thanks to everybody who supported me or disagreed with me.
You did your part in putting a smile on my face while writing this post.

One more thing

Starting tomorrow, we’ll be in 2015; defined by ‘Back to the future‘ as ‘the future‘. And the iconic movie wasn’t far off. We have watches with more computational power than the spacecraft that landed people on the moon. We have phones of only a few millimeters thick that make last years computers and cameras look bad. A world where we build machines that can land on comets racing through outer space. We live in a world with so many technical advantages, it’s hard to grasp they’re real.

Yet we also live in a world with hate, racism and discrimination of all kinds. In a world where many people consider same-gender sex and marriage as a sin. Where women have to fight for equal chances in career, life and history. Where a man can medically change genders but is bullied by those around him into suicide.

This needs to change. We need to start embracing each other. We need to let go of this notion that people who are different than us, are not the same as us. It’s not because somebody’s skin color isn’t ours, that he doesn’t work as hard as we do. It’s not because somebody is a woman, that she cannot run a company like any other man. It’s not because a person was born a man by the definitions of biology, that they cannot be a woman at heart.

We shouldn’t see the differences between people as a reason to classify them differently. We are all the same; no matter what gender, skin-color or sexual preference we have. We are all here to find happiness, adventure and love.

Happy 2015.

Ronny

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Ronny is a freelance frontend developer with a wild passion for creativity and a relentless hate against flat design. Ronny spent years as a Flash developer before moving to HTML5 and rediscovering fun and happiness.

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